This is arranged by tracks on the CD. The dialogues are transcribed under the tracks they are in. About a Girl ------------------------------------------------------------------------ Kurt: Good evening. This is off our first record. Most people don't own it. I need an easy friend I do ... with an ear to lend I do ... think you fit this shoe I do ... won't you have a clue I'll take advantage while You hang me out to dry But I can't see you every night Free I do I'm standing in your line I do ... hope you have the time I do ... pick a number too I do ... keep a date with you I'll take advantage while You hang me out to dry But I can't see you every night Free I do I need an easy friend I do ... with an ear to lend I do ... think you fit this shoe I do ... won't you have a clue I'll take advantage while You hang me out to dry But I can't see you every night (x2) Free I do ... (x4) ------------------------------------------------------------------------ Come As You Are ------------------------------------------------------------------------ Come as you are, as you were, As I want you to be As a friend, as a friend, as an old enemy. Take your time, hurry up The choice is yours, don't be late. Take a rest, as a friend, as an old memoria Memoria (x3) Come dowsed in mud, soaked in bleach As I want you to be As a trend, as a friend, as an old memoria Memoria (x3) And I swear that I don't have a gun No I don't have a gun (x2) Memoria (x4) And I swear that I don't have a gun No I don't have a gun (x5) Memoria Kurt: This was written by the Vaselines. Well, it's a... it's a rendition of an old... Christian song, I think. But we do it the Vaselines' way. ------------------------------------------------------------------------ Jesus Doesn't Want Me For A Sunbeam / Jesus Don't Want Me For A Sunbeam ------------------------------------------------------------------------ Jesus, don't want me for a sunbeam Sunbeams are never made like me (Alt: Sunbeams are laughing at me) Don't expect me to cry, For all the reasons you had to die Don't ever ask your love of me Don't expect me to cry Don't expect me to lie Don't expect me to die for me Jesus, don't want me for a sunbeam Sunbeams are never made like me (Alt: Sunbeams are laughing at me) Don't expect me to cry, For all the reasons you had to die Don't ever ask your love of me (x2) Don't expect me to cry Don't expect me to lie Don't expect me to die for me Jesus, don't want me for a sunbeam Sunbeams are never made like me (Alt: Sunbeams are laughing at me) Don't expect me to cry, For all the reasons you had to die Don't ever ask your love of me Don't expect me to cry Don't expect me to lie Don't expect me to die Don't expect me to cry Don't expect me to lie Don't expect me to die for me Originally by The Vaselines. Correct title should be "Jesus Don't Want Me For a Sunbeam". An incorrect title, using "Doesn't", is printed on the MTV Unplugged CD and covers. Though, I think the Vaselines used the title "Jesus wants me for a sunbeam" ... hmm. Kurt: I guarantee you I will screw this song up. So... Dave: What song is it? Krist: You know which part. Pat Smear: Dah! Dave: What? Kurt: Yeah. Well, I at least know which part I'll screw up. Dave: Yeah, like he only screws one up! ------------------------------------------------------------------------ The Man Who Sold The World ------------------------------------------------------------------------ We passed upon the stair We spoke of was and when Although I wasn't there He said I was his friend Which came as a surprise I spoke into his eyes I thought you died alone A long long time ago Oh no, not me We never lost control You're face to face With The Man Who Sold The World I laughed and shook his hand And made my way back home I searched for form and land (Alt: I searched for foreign land) For years and years I roamed I gazed a gazeless stare At all the millions here (Alt 1: We walked a million years) (Alt 2: With multimillionaires) (Alt 3: We walked a million hills) I must have died alone (Alt: I must have died along) A long, long time ago (x2) Who knows? Not me We never lost control You're face to face With the Man who Sold the World Originally by David Bowie Dave: What's next? That's was the first time that... Kurt: I didn't screw it up, did I? Dave: (Pat Smear laughs) No. Kurt: OK. But here's another one I could screw up. Dave: What is it? Kurt: Am I going to do this by myself? Pat Smear: Yeah, just do it by yourself... Dave: Do it by yourself. Kurt: Well, I think I'll try it in a different key. I'll try it in the normal key. And if it sounds bad... these people are just going to have to wait. We'll do it over. (audience laughs) Dave (asking someone): D'you have a smoke? ------------------------------------------------------------------------ Pennyroyal Tea ------------------------------------------------------------------------ I'm on my time with everyone I have very bad posture Sit and drink Pennyroyal Tea Distill the life that's inside of me Sit and drink Pennyroyal Tea I'm anemic royalty Give me a Leonard Cohen afterworld So I can sigh eternally I'm so tired I can't sleep I'm anemic royalty I'm a liar and a thief I'm anemic royalty I'm on warm milk and laxatives Cherry-flavored antacids Sit and drink Pennyroyal Tea Distill the life that's inside of me I'm anemic royalty (x2) Krist: That sounded good. Kurt: (jokingly) Shut up! ------------------------------------------------------------------------ Dumb ------------------------------------------------------------------------ Dave: Ready? 1, 2, 3, 4. I'm not like them But I can pretend The sun is gone But I have a light The day is done But I'm having fun I think I'm dumb Or maybe just happy Think I'm just happy (x3) My heart is broke But I have some glue Help me inhale And mend it with you We'll float around And hang out on clouds Then we'll come down And have a hangover ... Have a hangover (x3) Skin the sun Fall asleep Wish away The soul is cheap Lesson learned Wish me luck Soothe the burn Wake me up I'm not like them But I can pretend The sun is gone But I have a light The day is done But I'm having fun I think I'm dumb Think I'm just happy (x4) I think I'm dumb (x12) ------------------------------------------------------------------------ Polly ------------------------------------------------------------------------ Polly wants a cracker I think I should get off her first I think she wants some water To put out the blow torch It isn't me We have some seed Let me clip Your dirty wings Let me take a ride Don't cut yourself I want some help To help myself I've got some rope You have been told I promise you I have been true Let me take a ride Don't cut yourself I want some help To help myself Polly wants a cracker Maybe she would like more food She asks me to untie her A chase would be nice for a few It isn't me We have some seed Let me clip Your dirty wings Let me take a ride Don't cut yourself I want some help To help myself I've got some rope You have been told I promise you I have been true Let me take a ride Don't cut yourself I want some help To help myself Polly said Polly says her back hurts She's just as bored as me She caught me off my guard It amazes me, the will of instinct It isn't me We have some seed Let me clip Your dirty wings Let me take a ride Don't cut yourself I want some help To help myself I've got some rope You have been told I promise you I have been true Let me take a ride Don't cut yourself I want some help To help myself ------------------------------------------------------------------------ On A Plain ------------------------------------------------------------------------ I'll start this off without any words I got so high that I scratched 'till I bled I love myself better than you I know it's wrong so what should I do? The finest day that I ever had Was when I learned to cry on command I love myself better than you I know it's wrong so what should I do? I'm on a plain I can't complain I'm on a plain My brother died every night It's safe to say, don't quote me on that I love myself better than you I know it's wrong so what should I do? The black sheep got blackmailed again Forgot to put on the zip code I love myself better than you I know it's wrong so what should I do? I'm on a plain I can't complain I'm on a plain Somewhere I have heard this before In a dream my memory has stored As a defense I'm neutered and spayed What the hell am I trying to say? It is now time to make it unclear To write off lines that don't make sense I love myself better than you I know it's wrong so what should I do? And one more special message to go And then I'm done, then I can go home I love myself better than you I know it's wrong so what should I do? (x3) I'm on a plain I can't complain Kurt: (to someone in the production) Oh, yeah, I need you to do a little --- so I can keep talking. Dave: Hear that? Kurt: Yeah. ------------------------------------------------------------------------ Something In The Way ------------------------------------------------------------------------ Underneath the bridge The tarp has sprung a leak And the animals I've trapped Have all become my pets And I'm living off of grass And the drippings from the ceiling It's okay to eat fish 'Cause they don't have any feelings (x2) Something in the way, mmm Something in the way, yeah, mmm Underneath the bridge The tarp has sprung a leak And the animals I've trapped Have all become my pets And I'm living off of grass And the drippings from the ceiling It's okay to eat fish 'Cause they dont't have any feelings (x4) Something in the way, mmm Something in the way, yeah, mmm Kurt: I only have three cups of tea already, but thank you! Dave: Tell a joke Krist. Kurt: What are they tuning, a harp? I thought we were a big, rich rock band. We should have a whole bunch of extra guitars. Krist: Tell that to the IRS! Chris Kirkwood: Do I need to use this? ------------------------------------------------------------------------ Plateau ------------------------------------------------------------------------ Many a hand has scaled the grand old face of the plateau Some belong to strangers and some to folks you know Holy ghosts and talk show hosts are planted in the sand To beautify the foothills and shake the many hands The nothing on the top but a bucket and a mop And an illustrated book about birds You see a lot up there but don't be scared Who needs action when you got words When you've finished with the mop then you can stop And look at what you've done The plateau's clean, no dirt to be seen And the work it was fun There's nothing on the top but a bucket and a mop And an illustrated book about birds You see a lot up there but don't be scared Who needs action when you got words Well the many hands began to scan around for the next plateau Some said it was in Greenland and some say Mexico Others decided it was nowhere except for where they stood But those were all just guesses, wouldn't help you if they could Originally by the Meat Puppets Kurt: 'kay... (someone makes funny noises) Krist: That's Curt and that's Chris. Curt Kirkwood: No, no, I'm Curt! That's... Chris Kirkwood: No, I'm thing one... that's thing two. Kurt: Cover your hair and your eyes, then. 'Kay, this is called "Oh, Me". Dave: Oh! (surprised) ------------------------------------------------------------------------ Oh, Me ------------------------------------------------------------------------ If I had to lose a mile If I had to touch feelings I would lose my soul The way I do I don't have to think I only have to do it The results are always perfect And that's old news Would you like to hear my voice Sprinkled with emotion Invented at your birth? I can't see the end of me My whole expanse I cannot see I formulate infinity Stored deep inside me If I had to lose a mile If I had to touch feelings I would lose my soul The way I do I don't have to think I only have to do it The results are always perfect And that's old news Would you like to hear my voice Sprinkled with emotion Invented at your birth? I can't see the end of me My whole expanse I cannot see (x2) I formulate infinity Stored deep inside me Originally by the Meat Puppets Krist: We are the winners (with audience applause) Kurt: (clearing throat) One more. This is called "Lake Of Fire". All these songs are off their second record. Dave: Ready y'all? ------------------------------------------------------------------------ Lake Of Fire ------------------------------------------------------------------------ Where do bad folks go when they die? They don't go to heaven where the angels fly They go to the lake of fire and fry Won't see them again 'till the fourth of July I knew a lady who came from Duluth She got bit by a dog with a rabid tooth She went to her grave just a little too soon And she flew away howling on the yellow moon Where do bad folks go when they die? They don't go to heaven where the angels fly They go down to the lake of fire and fry Won't see them again 'till the fourth of July Now the people cry and the people moan And they look for a dry place to call their home And try to find some place to rest their bones While the angels and the devils try to make them their own Where do bad folks go when they die? They don't go to heaven where the angels fly They go down to the lake of fire and fry Won't see them again 'till the fourth of July Originally by the Meat Puppets Curt K.: Thank you! Take your time! Thank you! Chris K.: FUCKING NIRVANA!!! Kurt: That was the Meat Puppets. ------------------------------------------------------------------------ All Apologies ------------------------------------------------------------------------ What else should I be All apologies What else should I say Everyone is gay What else should I write I don't have the right What else should I be All apologies In the sun In the sun I feel as one In the sun In the sun Married Buried I wish I was like you Easily amused Find my nest of salt Everything is my fault I'll take all the blame Aqua seafoam shame Sunburn with freezeburn Choking on the ashes of her enemy In the sun In the sun I feel as one In the sun In the sun (x2) Married Buried Yeah, yeah yeah yeah (x13) All in all is all we are Kurt: This was written by my favorite performer... Our favorite performer, isn't it? All of us. Do you like him the best? Krist: Oh! There's a donation basket. Kurt wants to buy Leadbelly's guitar... Kurt: Oh yeah! This guy representing the Leadbelly Estate wants to sell me Leadbelly's guitar for 500.000 dollars. Krist: We're passing a basket if you want to help. Kurt: Yeah. I even asked David Geffen personally if he'd buy it for me... he wouldn't do it. ------------------------------------------------------------------------ Where Did You Sleep Last Night? ------------------------------------------------------------------------ My girl, my girl, don't lie to me Tell me where did you sleep last night In the pines, in the pines Where the sun don't ever shine I would shiver the whole night through My girl, my girl, where will you go I'm going where the cold wind blows In the pines, in the pines Where the sun don't ever shine I would shiver the whole night through Her husband, was a hard working man Just about a mile from here His head was found in a driving wheel But his body never was found My girl, my girl, don't lie to me Tell me where did you sleep last night In the pines, in the pines Where the sun don't ever shine I would shiver the whole night through My girl, my girl, where will you go I'm going where the cold wind blows In the pines, in the pines Where the sun don't ever shine I would shiver the whole night through My girl, my girl, don't lie to me Tell me where did you sleep last night In the pines, in the pines Where the sun don't ever shine I would shiver the whole night through My girl, my girl, where will you go I'm going where the cold wind blows In the pines, in the pines Where the sun don't ever shine I would shiver the whole night through Originally by Ledbelly. Written by Huddie Ledbetter. Kurt: Thank you!